First, drinkin' words:
- mortgage
- Wall Street and Main Street (within 10 seconds of each other)
- independent
- insider
- maverick
- the surge
- middle class tax cuts
- folks
- deregulation (half a sip - you don't want to get drunk, do you?)
- Reformer (thank you, Een!)
Suggestions?
(Yes, I'm at home. NOT at work drinking - that's, uh, frowned upon.)
McCain: Rescue! Fannie and Freddie = bad! Obama knows and took $ from people who worked at F & F = bad!
Obama: I've got to correct some of McCain's history - not surprisingly. *snerk alert*
Woman's question: How can we trust you?
Rogue's answer: You can't, dumbass!
(Regulation, Mr. De-Regulation!)
McCain: I know how to fix this economy! Dagnabit!!!
(Was McCain a cheerleader too?)
Obama: 1. Energy! Dependency on Middle Eastern oil = bad! 2. Health care! 3. Education!
McCain: We may have to eliminate some programs. We may have to eliminate those that aren't working.
[WOW!]
Eliminate earmarks! [note: earmarks intentionally left off drinking list due to desire to stay relatively sober]
Obama: Trillion dollar debts = bad! Spending + revenue = must jive, duh!
McCain: Nailin' Jello to the wall! Herbert Hoover! Protectionism! I know Senator Obama's secret!!! He's gonna getcha! He's pallin' around with terrrists! Taxes! Tax cuts! Go out and get the health insurance you want! Rah!
* Live-blogging brought to you by Airlie gewurztramier *
McCain: Social Security isn't that tough!!! I saw it done with our wonderful Ronald Reagan!
World: WTF!!!
Rogue: [censored] ... Why is he whispering? So weird!
Obama: This is an opportunity. We're gonna have to make an investment.
Obama: Health care costs = crushing burden. Economic imperative to do something about it.
McCain: Impose efficiencies! [WHOOPS! That's not what your sound bite notes say!] Gubment = bad! Gold-plated Cadillac coverage for hair transplant - like I might need myself [Strike two!]
Obama: It's a right. My mother died of cancer at 53 and spent the last few months of her life arguing with her life insurance about whether it was a preexisting condition.
Obama: Government must crack down on insurance companies foolin' you with the fine print. McCain gonna kill you with deregulation!
Brokaw: Obama doctrine!
Obama: Moral obligations!
McCain: Let me just follow up, my friends! [He has lots of friends. Prolly cuz of his daughter's blog.] Senator O would have brought our troops home with defeat; I would bring them home with victory and dignity. Oh yes!!! ... Cool hand! I've got cool hands! [Um, hothead has cool hands?!? Are you fucking kidding me? Just because you whisper, dude, does not make you an anger management graduate!]
Obama: Pahhkistan! [Oh, Sarah Palin knows the American people's common sense outweighs your smarty pants elitism, Mr. Pahhkistan, and she will talk to the American people directly despite those goshdarn questions because she knows you know that she knows what's best like up there in Alaska! *wink*]
McCain: I am responsible goddamnit!
Rogue: Bwahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!
Obama: We must anticipate these problems. [Like, um, keeping tabs on current events?] Being reactive is stupid. [Why do you have to be so goshdarn smart? That's so unpatriotic.] Let's be strategic. [Stop it! Stop this smarty-pants bullshit! Americans don't need smarts - we are God's chosen people. Err, God's chosen land. Err, the home of lots of God's chosen people outside of God's chosen land? Uh... Go Alaska!]
McCain: Flattering questioner to buy time....
Obama: blahblahblah.... oil infrastructure... blahblahblah... cost-benefit analysis... blahblahblah... tough, direct message if you don't change your behavior there will be dire consequences... blahblahblah... [Obama reminds me of my parents talking to me when I was a teenager - don't talk down to people, dude - these people are not academics]
Brokaw: What don't you know and how will you learn it? Zen zinger!
Obama: I came from modest means. I succeeded. Are we going to pass on that same American dream to the next generation? Health care sucks. College is too expensive. The dream is harder to achieve now. We need fundamental change.
McCain: I have been practicing this patronizing tone for a long time and I've been practicing this fear-filling speech for a long time so I can scare you into voting for me, suckahs! Oh wait - COUNTRY FIRST!
How would you like to make a difference in the life of a public school students?
For the second year in a row, Six Apart is participating in the DonorsChoose.org Blogger Challenge. The challenge runs all throughout the month of October, and we'd love for you to participate along with us. Just as we did last year, Six Apart is sponsoring the award for the bloggers who reach the most kids.
The Blogger Challenge is a friendly contest amongst bloggers to raise money for low-income public schools. Here's how it works: teachers from all over the country post items for which they would like funding, such as writing supplies for a journalism class, equipment for a science lab, or music instruments for a band class. Bloggers choose their favorite projects and link to their challenge page in a post or via a giving widget on their blog. The bloggers who raise the most money or reach the most kids will win an award.
Here's how you can participate:
- Go to the Donors Choose Blogger Challenge page and find a blogger's giving list you'd like to support.
or
- Set up your own challenge and let your readers know in a blog post or by installing the widget (it just takes a few clicks).
No matter which way you choose to participate, you should feel incredibly proud of yourself for helping to bring resources to students in struggling classrooms.
Donors Choose will announce the results in early November, and we'll reveal the winners of the Six Apart award for bloggers who reached the most students shortly thereafter.
Are you going to accept the Blogger Challenge? Tell us about it (and link to it) in the comments!